Do a (SWOT) analysis on Your Kids Before You Crucified Them
S = STRENGTH
W = WEAKNESS
O = OPPORTUNITIES
T = THREATS
I have tried several times since yesterday not to talk about this, but there’s a crawcraw in my hand that keeps pushing me.
I was on my way home yesterday when I stopped by a woman’s shop to buy groundnut. I had bought this fresh banana and the only thing that kept ringing in my head after I bought it was groundnut, groundnut, almost like a nursery rhyme. Yeah, dinner was going to be a bomb! Who says good life must necessarily come expensive? Tueh!
I got to her shop, horned severally but there was no response. I was hearing muffled sounds from inside her retail store and knew she was in there. I waited a bit inside the car, too tired to get out and then shouted her name. ‘Mummy Sewa, se e wa ninu shop?’. Chai! Still no response o. I was already close to the house and had passed several supermarts. I hated buying groundnuts from those big stores bcos most of the time, it’s stale and no longer sweet as it should be. But Mummy Sewa’s own is always fresh and yummy.
Anyways, I finally got down, went into her shop, saw no one, then went in to the backyard. Some few steps from there, I started hearing Tazai, kpokam, whai, voom and a loud wailing from a small lad. Mummy please, please, I will take 1st next term. Plsss, I will not be watching TV again… Haha. Which kain wahala be this? I ran closer to the woman, blocked the boy and a whip almost landed on my back. I was madly enraged and almost landed her a slap. How dare you suffer a young child like this? Is this not the way parents unconsciously groom potential abusers? Is this what will make him be at the top position next term?
Mummy Sharon, please leave o. I must kill him today. He came 13th in his class after all my wahala on him. Shebi you know his dad has left all of us since and I’ve been the one suffering day and night. Haaa yeeeee. I must finish him o. All he does is watch TV and play ball. Nothing else.
Take it easy Ma. I told her, but she wouldn’t hear none of it. She was still shaking and vibrating like a rickety agbegilodo.
Oya, kill him na. You go soon kamdan now. What was your own grade when you were his age? By the time he lands in the hospital, I’m sure your Apollo eyes will clear. I was starting to boil up myself.
Afterwards, I told the boy to follow me in my car, left both the groundnut and the seller and zoomed off. Mission groundnut aborted!
I don’t know why Parents do this shit.
The first time I caught my son teaching his elder sister her maths assignment, I was shell-shocked. As in Se owo oti jona bayi? Sharon hated mathematics with every fibre in her and never seem to get it right. I was tempted to shout on her then but I always manage to keep my calm. Unlike Simon, she has never been first before in her class but I always encouraged her. Later I began to realise her strength and area of core competency- English. She can spell any word. She can read anything, She can narrate a whole book from beginning to ending without mincing words. She loves to dance Salsa. She likes to sing. She still hates Maths but she’s getting better. And last Session, she got the overall best in English in her grade.
We can’t all be good at everything.
Our kids can’t be the best at everything.
We need to be close to them to learn where their strengths lie.
The case of the 12 year old boy who tried to poison his fellow classmate at Lekki British international school just because he was coveting the first position always play in my mind. Who knows what the root cause is? Who knows if he was under pressure from home to get the slot otherwise they won’t take him for a vacation in Bahamas or buy him his dream bicycle or whatever…..
The pressure Parents put their kids through ehn….. You must be a doctor, you must be a lawyer, I want you to become a Pilot, an Engineer. Bla Bla Bla
Will you keep kwayet there!
We need to realise being at the first, second or third position does not guarantee success in life. Intelligence, hardwork, creative instincts all covered with Grace does.
I graduated with a Second Class upper in Computer Engineering (even though Dad did everything to make sure I studied Medicine). I have MSCE, CCNP and CompTIA certifications. By God’s grace, I have an online MSC degree. I have an OAU MBA degree. But I’m using none at my present place of work. Even with all these, I have friends who graduated with a third Class or Pass doing way way better than me. I see them and I’m grateful to God for His grace upon their lives. I feel they’ve achieved much more.
But then, what is the measure of achievement? Is it quantified in monetary terms alone? Is it by the physical assets one has acquired? No! I don’t think so.
What pushes us in life differs.
Some just want to make money.
Some just want to create history.
Some just wanted to break a jinx in their household.
Some just want to be famous
Some just want to put smiles on other people’s faces.
Some just want to be happy.
Some just want to change the status quo in the world we are.
Some just want to get married.
Some just…..
And when they get this, they have achieved all what they wanna fulfil in life. And there’s nothing you can do or say to convince them otherwise.
Let’s stop putting so much pressure on our children. Let’s encourage them to be who they wanna be. Success isn’t measured via academic pursuits alone.
Do a SWOT analysis of your kids. Strength, weakness, opportunities and threats.
Live your dream and let them live theirs. Don’t force the fulfilment of your failed dreams through these innocent souls.
With encouragement, support, prayers, they will be the best in whatever they set out to do.
Back to Mama Sewa’s case, I took the boy back to his house after about an hour and spoke some sense to the mum.
I believe she would have had a change of heart.
No Child is an Olodo! Their position last term doesn’t matter. That is not the only determinant for future success.
May our children be better and greater than us.
Amen!
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